miércoles, diciembre 29
Por tres años rotos
Y esta fecha siempre traerá memorias pasadas; memorias que se guardan en ese lugar al que nadie se atreve a llegar, que jamás salen en una conversación casual, ni cuando las luces bajan ni cuando se escuchan los segundos en el reloj.
Chocando nuestras tazas de cafe y té, hago un brindis por no poder haber cumplido ninguno de estos días, las promesas pasadas y las lágrimas derramadas se quedan de nuevo en el año que pasa; que apropiado a de sonar con el año nuevo por venir.
No quiero repetir, escuchar ni sentir lo que alguna vez hice a tu lado, es como el río viejo y mohoso que solo quiere correr con la misma fuerza con la que lo hacía cuando las corrientes estaban cargadas de agua y estruendo resonaba en las montañas... pero que recuerdos aquellos.
Este día cariño, este día.... tu sabes que en mi mente estarás, y todo lo que alguna ves que te quise decir, se quedó en el aire o acurrucado en mi garganta. Siempre es grato, y siempre funciona, por lo cual es una de las razones por las que nisiquiera lo quiero intentar, la historia debe de quedarse así, como un relato que suena a dulce pecado, para ya no escribir extensiones del mismo.
Y ya no me cuesta trabajo admitirlo, sigo siendo la misma, tres años de sorprenderme por aquel sentimiento que quedo igual desde entonces. Porque siempre seras el misterio de mi vida, y espero algun día encontrarte y que tan solo nuestros ojos se reconozcan para luego desviar las miradas y seguir con nuestras vidas; y asi de dramático suena, por que así lo es, así fue...
Es algo más, que nisiquiera nombre existe para clasificar, si me permites confesar: Nunca toque fondo, siempre espere quedarnos juntas y la esperanza reside al final.
Sigue siendo especial, tal vez el lazo o las memorias, o tal ves en otras dimensiones, el tiempo presente se siente tan apresurado que nisiquiera me deja recordarte cuando preparo el desayuno. Pero en fin, dos veces es más que suficiente para saber que no se puede evitar lo inevitable, y por que decidida estas, y determinada estoy, para entender que tu y yo jamás se repetirá en ningún sentido... pero nunca dejaré de estar agradecida, por una personita soy lo que soy y viví la experiencia de mi vida; casi increíble, pero me encanta presumir de ello.
Tantas canciones, tantos versos, tantos susurros, expresiones, miradas y cariños que vienen a mi cabeza. La sonrisa que nacía, las ganas de quedarse, detener el tiempo y tan solo estar a la expectativa. Por que hermoso fue, y la pena queda corto para decir cuánto valió la pena; cuando mis ojos se inundan al pronunciar tu nombre o tu recuerdo me abruma en mis momentos reflexivos.
Deseando por un final alternativo, tratando de mantenerme en algo real, tu ya no estas. Jamás me perderás, si es lo que temes, por que el lazo siempre estará, entonces perderé el tiempo en una espera ingrata.
Y aquel raro diciembre donde toda esta odisea comenzó, no había otra opción, no lo pudimos resistir, y nunca me arrepentí. Y heme aquí repitiendo la misma canción para hablar de ti, para ya no volver a hacerlo, y despedirme como lo hice ayer: Buenas noches... pequeña, sabes que mi amor y cariño están contigo y que me mata saber que ya no será igual, parece que switch para ti sí funciono.
Y ya no he de citar los viejos tiempos, por que tanto como tu como yo, queremos dejar esto atras para jamás volver. Sin pretensiones ni malos tratos, la verdad ya todos la sabemos.
Por siempre veintinueve, te amo nena.
Chocando nuestras tazas de cafe y té, hago un brindis por no poder haber cumplido ninguno de estos días, las promesas pasadas y las lágrimas derramadas se quedan de nuevo en el año que pasa; que apropiado a de sonar con el año nuevo por venir.
No quiero repetir, escuchar ni sentir lo que alguna vez hice a tu lado, es como el río viejo y mohoso que solo quiere correr con la misma fuerza con la que lo hacía cuando las corrientes estaban cargadas de agua y estruendo resonaba en las montañas... pero que recuerdos aquellos.
Este día cariño, este día.... tu sabes que en mi mente estarás, y todo lo que alguna ves que te quise decir, se quedó en el aire o acurrucado en mi garganta. Siempre es grato, y siempre funciona, por lo cual es una de las razones por las que nisiquiera lo quiero intentar, la historia debe de quedarse así, como un relato que suena a dulce pecado, para ya no escribir extensiones del mismo.
Y ya no me cuesta trabajo admitirlo, sigo siendo la misma, tres años de sorprenderme por aquel sentimiento que quedo igual desde entonces. Porque siempre seras el misterio de mi vida, y espero algun día encontrarte y que tan solo nuestros ojos se reconozcan para luego desviar las miradas y seguir con nuestras vidas; y asi de dramático suena, por que así lo es, así fue...
Es algo más, que nisiquiera nombre existe para clasificar, si me permites confesar: Nunca toque fondo, siempre espere quedarnos juntas y la esperanza reside al final.
Sigue siendo especial, tal vez el lazo o las memorias, o tal ves en otras dimensiones, el tiempo presente se siente tan apresurado que nisiquiera me deja recordarte cuando preparo el desayuno. Pero en fin, dos veces es más que suficiente para saber que no se puede evitar lo inevitable, y por que decidida estas, y determinada estoy, para entender que tu y yo jamás se repetirá en ningún sentido... pero nunca dejaré de estar agradecida, por una personita soy lo que soy y viví la experiencia de mi vida; casi increíble, pero me encanta presumir de ello.
Tantas canciones, tantos versos, tantos susurros, expresiones, miradas y cariños que vienen a mi cabeza. La sonrisa que nacía, las ganas de quedarse, detener el tiempo y tan solo estar a la expectativa. Por que hermoso fue, y la pena queda corto para decir cuánto valió la pena; cuando mis ojos se inundan al pronunciar tu nombre o tu recuerdo me abruma en mis momentos reflexivos.
Deseando por un final alternativo, tratando de mantenerme en algo real, tu ya no estas. Jamás me perderás, si es lo que temes, por que el lazo siempre estará, entonces perderé el tiempo en una espera ingrata.
Y aquel raro diciembre donde toda esta odisea comenzó, no había otra opción, no lo pudimos resistir, y nunca me arrepentí. Y heme aquí repitiendo la misma canción para hablar de ti, para ya no volver a hacerlo, y despedirme como lo hice ayer: Buenas noches... pequeña, sabes que mi amor y cariño están contigo y que me mata saber que ya no será igual, parece que switch para ti sí funciono.
Y ya no he de citar los viejos tiempos, por que tanto como tu como yo, queremos dejar esto atras para jamás volver. Sin pretensiones ni malos tratos, la verdad ya todos la sabemos.
Por siempre veintinueve, te amo nena.
miércoles, diciembre 15
Insomia
Se despertó en su cama
y el sudor estaba por todos lados.
Tiesa como una tabla con los ojos desorbitados
con el sonido del ventilador girando.
y el sudor estaba por todos lados.
Tiesa como una tabla con los ojos desorbitados
con el sonido del ventilador girando.
lunes, noviembre 29
En Marte
Dime una historia,
cuentame cuantos y cuentos,
una vez más termina de ser, que esta noche no quiero ser, ni siquiera intentar.
Cuentame cuantas veces tengo que doblar mi cuello y curvar mi espalda,
sin mirar hacia abajo y una mirada más hacia arriba cuando todo da vueltas y la cabeza no vuelve hacia ti.
Salir de aquí, ir a donde nadie está, donde yo nomas te puedo encontrar.
Retoques y retimbres, timpanos y retumbes, donde las espirales giran alreves.
La verdad y la felicidad, cuentame otra vez, cómo llegas hacia ella.
Acordes y renombres que solian resonar en algún rincón donde te iba a buscar quedarse sonaba placiadamente mientras mi piel se enchinaba y el frío corría por cada una de mis vertebras, la vista se nublabla y yo nada más te quería tocar.
La nueva vida, la estola perdida y el revuelo que siente mi estomago por las mañanas cuando ya no estas junto a mi cama.
Las fantasías, sueños y habladurías, quedan en el pestañeo de aquella ves que sonreí mientras te observaba e imaginaba que la vida si era así de dulce y que los pajaros cantaban cuando sabían que te amaba.
Y sentir que flores quedaban a mi paso y la luz encandilaba más.
Jugar para no pensar, soñar para no imaginar, la somnolencia del creativo y la futura realidad que no vendra, porque hoy en día decidí dejar de establecer para comenzar a vivir y dejar vivir, cuando ya no estas y yo...
los sonidos se intensifican y las tensiones corren mas aprisa, los poros transpiran y aliento se agita.
Pense una vez más cuando nada ya quedaba, para solo llegar a donde ya estoy, que todo es mejor que tan solo una idea no basta para mantener un ideal, y la resignación se convierte en mi cantar.
cuentame cuantos y cuentos,
una vez más termina de ser, que esta noche no quiero ser, ni siquiera intentar.
Cuentame cuantas veces tengo que doblar mi cuello y curvar mi espalda,
sin mirar hacia abajo y una mirada más hacia arriba cuando todo da vueltas y la cabeza no vuelve hacia ti.
Salir de aquí, ir a donde nadie está, donde yo nomas te puedo encontrar.
Retoques y retimbres, timpanos y retumbes, donde las espirales giran alreves.
La verdad y la felicidad, cuentame otra vez, cómo llegas hacia ella.
Acordes y renombres que solian resonar en algún rincón donde te iba a buscar quedarse sonaba placiadamente mientras mi piel se enchinaba y el frío corría por cada una de mis vertebras, la vista se nublabla y yo nada más te quería tocar.
La nueva vida, la estola perdida y el revuelo que siente mi estomago por las mañanas cuando ya no estas junto a mi cama.
Las fantasías, sueños y habladurías, quedan en el pestañeo de aquella ves que sonreí mientras te observaba e imaginaba que la vida si era así de dulce y que los pajaros cantaban cuando sabían que te amaba.
Y sentir que flores quedaban a mi paso y la luz encandilaba más.
Jugar para no pensar, soñar para no imaginar, la somnolencia del creativo y la futura realidad que no vendra, porque hoy en día decidí dejar de establecer para comenzar a vivir y dejar vivir, cuando ya no estas y yo...
los sonidos se intensifican y las tensiones corren mas aprisa, los poros transpiran y aliento se agita.
Pense una vez más cuando nada ya quedaba, para solo llegar a donde ya estoy, que todo es mejor que tan solo una idea no basta para mantener un ideal, y la resignación se convierte en mi cantar.
lunes, noviembre 22
This and that
And I feel like I will never eat again,
the saddest part of me was wondering for this night.
I keep chocking and breathing is running and the dates are coming closer, and rushing days, the irrelevant events, the next step, the longer I take, the wider it has been and how much I wish I could stop.
How much, how many and other wonders...
The fake I am, the real I stay, how I started to lose the track of things! It's amazing how ever since, everything has turned your way. How are things seen from the common sense people, how they move in life and just for the hope of tomorrow. It's curious how I started to become regular, and the little part makes me special remains on my heart, like it that little part belong with you, or reminded of how amazing was the world when I looked at it with you by my side.
And the last days had been comfortable and easy, nothing like me, but it seems like the integration has called me to be part of a whole.
Looking for the adventure, but nothing was more exciting than the impossible made possible, someone to share it, someone to live it, to feel it.
Uncontrollable and noisy, the bed, the table, the sand, the sky, the view, the crowd, the throat... they are all anxy and all the sounds in my head, the thoughts that I'm dying to take and the impulses that I'm driven to give and the rules that I'm about to forget.
the saddest part of me was wondering for this night.
I keep chocking and breathing is running and the dates are coming closer, and rushing days, the irrelevant events, the next step, the longer I take, the wider it has been and how much I wish I could stop.
How much, how many and other wonders...
The fake I am, the real I stay, how I started to lose the track of things! It's amazing how ever since, everything has turned your way. How are things seen from the common sense people, how they move in life and just for the hope of tomorrow. It's curious how I started to become regular, and the little part makes me special remains on my heart, like it that little part belong with you, or reminded of how amazing was the world when I looked at it with you by my side.
And the last days had been comfortable and easy, nothing like me, but it seems like the integration has called me to be part of a whole.
Looking for the adventure, but nothing was more exciting than the impossible made possible, someone to share it, someone to live it, to feel it.
Uncontrollable and noisy, the bed, the table, the sand, the sky, the view, the crowd, the throat... they are all anxy and all the sounds in my head, the thoughts that I'm dying to take and the impulses that I'm driven to give and the rules that I'm about to forget.
lunes, noviembre 15
Pictures and covers
There was one time, that I can't recall; there was something that I could smell that made feel that I was being part of something, a place where I used to belong.
Word after word, there was something that I created; people was just a shadow or a vanished vision but still I couldn't see through.
Chocked and unable to swallow, it keeps obstructing my throat.
Then the fan made some air that reminded me of time... I repeat: I don't remember when it was!
She was running and I couldn't stop her. Splitting was one part of the time of change. I felt that I was someone else.
For the last few days I have been wondering who's the new me that has taken possession of my body; extremities, organs, bones and air... what keeps bothering on my throat?
Sometimes I feel that I want to vomit, but it not something on my stomach, it's something else dying to come out, but why does it has to be through my mouth?
Numbers and questions, the shorter breathings and the expanded doubt.
A missing part or a misunderstood side perhaps...
I haven't seen my shallow in a while, there's no reason to miss it, but it's always part of it.
This wasn't part of the deal, remember that night under the covers when I prayed to you.
My hands are still together but I think I lost my head, my devotion is spreaded away, the beautifulness is not under the spotlight, I guess it went to take a walk. Mean while my focus is vested all over the place, when I know I was made for just one night.
Word after word, there was something that I created; people was just a shadow or a vanished vision but still I couldn't see through.
Chocked and unable to swallow, it keeps obstructing my throat.
Then the fan made some air that reminded me of time... I repeat: I don't remember when it was!
She was running and I couldn't stop her. Splitting was one part of the time of change. I felt that I was someone else.
For the last few days I have been wondering who's the new me that has taken possession of my body; extremities, organs, bones and air... what keeps bothering on my throat?
Sometimes I feel that I want to vomit, but it not something on my stomach, it's something else dying to come out, but why does it has to be through my mouth?
Numbers and questions, the shorter breathings and the expanded doubt.
A missing part or a misunderstood side perhaps...
I haven't seen my shallow in a while, there's no reason to miss it, but it's always part of it.
This wasn't part of the deal, remember that night under the covers when I prayed to you.
My hands are still together but I think I lost my head, my devotion is spreaded away, the beautifulness is not under the spotlight, I guess it went to take a walk. Mean while my focus is vested all over the place, when I know I was made for just one night.
miércoles, noviembre 3
martes, noviembre 2
Come.
And so I thought, even the most beautiful story has to come to the end, but its the spirit what makes it immortal.
And so and so, let's pretend... there's nothing else to hold on, the beauty didn't come to meet the beast. The lovely story finishes another chapter; and all the muscles tense, autism becomes regular basis; and so and yeah... bad habits, good habits, and the ashes that the wind refuses to spread. And then I was ready, but you never were truly mine; all breaths that I took on your neck are suffocated. It's easy to be somewhere else, but you were always the target that my hypnotism decided to stare. But I agree and disagree... understandable, understandable, yes, when summer loving come to it's end, autumn must protest... and winter must come to feel the cold.
There's something great on you, something that makes you greater... and something that I love.
And so, and so, I wont know; I guess there's nothing more.
So, there's no place like home.
And so and so, let's pretend... there's nothing else to hold on, the beauty didn't come to meet the beast. The lovely story finishes another chapter; and all the muscles tense, autism becomes regular basis; and so and yeah... bad habits, good habits, and the ashes that the wind refuses to spread. And then I was ready, but you never were truly mine; all breaths that I took on your neck are suffocated. It's easy to be somewhere else, but you were always the target that my hypnotism decided to stare. But I agree and disagree... understandable, understandable, yes, when summer loving come to it's end, autumn must protest... and winter must come to feel the cold.
There's something great on you, something that makes you greater... and something that I love.
And so, and so, I wont know; I guess there's nothing more.
So, there's no place like home.
domingo, septiembre 5
Thoughts on my cereal.
What if I just realized about it?
An instant flew away to make me see what was going on around,
the sea up above us, and the water doesn't comes down
lights and storms looking delightfully through my eyes,
can't look down, I can't wait for me to run towards my faith,
myself exploding about all the feelings that I want to disperse.
And the storm seems to be on hold, awake and anxious, but waiting for the first drop to fall, and then release all of its power and crawl all below, and the strength might lost it's way, but still doesn't care, I just want to spread away... but the clouds move, the wind blows, the lightings bright the my mind and the thunder keeps me awake. Ever since, still the lovely sky takes me out to dance.
An instant flew away to make me see what was going on around,
the sea up above us, and the water doesn't comes down
lights and storms looking delightfully through my eyes,
can't look down, I can't wait for me to run towards my faith,
myself exploding about all the feelings that I want to disperse.
And the storm seems to be on hold, awake and anxious, but waiting for the first drop to fall, and then release all of its power and crawl all below, and the strength might lost it's way, but still doesn't care, I just want to spread away... but the clouds move, the wind blows, the lightings bright the my mind and the thunder keeps me awake. Ever since, still the lovely sky takes me out to dance.
viernes, agosto 13
Intenciones en cama.
Esta noche me he de declarar una persona adicta al sexo.
Podrá sonar de manera abrupta, pero no pienso dar explicaciones,
simplemente dejaré fluir lo que me llevó a tal dictamen:
Hemos de pasar mucho tiempo separadas,
casi casi una relación basada en palabras... y dicen que las palabras se las lleva el viento...
Pero no intento decir que nuestra relación es volátil amor,
me expresaré de manera más adecuada:
Todo ese tiempo que estoy sin tí, desearía poder estarlo, mas sin embargo se que es una condición difícil de cometer, aún así me aferro a tu recuerdo, que me da mas hambre de ti, asi que intento vagar por otros pasajes, ¡Vaya! No quiero atormentarme mientras se que te tengo.
Y camino y divago por esa senda que tan solo me mueve de un día a otro.
Pero tu no eres parte de eso, tu caminas comigo, yo te llevo conmigo, no te dejo al paso que doy, ni volteo hacia atrás para tener otra perspectiva para ver como se ve lo que antes aprecie de frente.
Constante en mi andar, a quien abrazo tan celosamente cuando se encuentra entre mis brazos,
a quien muero por comerme a besos, arrancar el olor de su tersa piel, y saciarme con su perfume, lo suave de sus cabellos cuando rozan mi cara y poder tomarla fuerte de su cintura y poder apretarla contra mi cuerpo al momento de sentir su respiración en mi cuello, aún cuando siento que toda mi superficie esta siendo tocada por ella, es como si quisiera poder convertirme en ella, poder llegar más alla de un abrazo físico, sentir más en un beso, poder entrar más ella mientras reposa en mi cama, poder arrebatar su aliento cuando expira fuertemente y así constantemente irla convirtiendo mia.
Lamento si evito una conversación y tan solo me interesa concentrarme en tu estado físico, es solo que he tenido tiempo de admirar la grandeza de tu pensar, el sentido de tu caminar, lo maravilloso de tu personalidad y lo hipnotizante de tus palabras; ahora tan solo quiero aprovechar el tiempo en tu regazo, amarte de la manera en que tanto anhelo, donde no falte ningún aspecto, y no exista el hambre sobre mi deseo.
Perdona si me pierdo, ¡Pero nunca pierdas la certeza de que siempre serás tú! Tus ojos preciosos a los que me encanta contemplar y la mirada en la que me gusta soñar, cuando nos encontramos en ese rato que nadie nos puede robar, en donde tu y yo nos podemos amar.
Podrá sonar de manera abrupta, pero no pienso dar explicaciones,
simplemente dejaré fluir lo que me llevó a tal dictamen:
Hemos de pasar mucho tiempo separadas,
casi casi una relación basada en palabras... y dicen que las palabras se las lleva el viento...
Pero no intento decir que nuestra relación es volátil amor,
me expresaré de manera más adecuada:
Todo ese tiempo que estoy sin tí, desearía poder estarlo, mas sin embargo se que es una condición difícil de cometer, aún así me aferro a tu recuerdo, que me da mas hambre de ti, asi que intento vagar por otros pasajes, ¡Vaya! No quiero atormentarme mientras se que te tengo.
Y camino y divago por esa senda que tan solo me mueve de un día a otro.
Pero tu no eres parte de eso, tu caminas comigo, yo te llevo conmigo, no te dejo al paso que doy, ni volteo hacia atrás para tener otra perspectiva para ver como se ve lo que antes aprecie de frente.
Constante en mi andar, a quien abrazo tan celosamente cuando se encuentra entre mis brazos,
a quien muero por comerme a besos, arrancar el olor de su tersa piel, y saciarme con su perfume, lo suave de sus cabellos cuando rozan mi cara y poder tomarla fuerte de su cintura y poder apretarla contra mi cuerpo al momento de sentir su respiración en mi cuello, aún cuando siento que toda mi superficie esta siendo tocada por ella, es como si quisiera poder convertirme en ella, poder llegar más alla de un abrazo físico, sentir más en un beso, poder entrar más ella mientras reposa en mi cama, poder arrebatar su aliento cuando expira fuertemente y así constantemente irla convirtiendo mia.
Lamento si evito una conversación y tan solo me interesa concentrarme en tu estado físico, es solo que he tenido tiempo de admirar la grandeza de tu pensar, el sentido de tu caminar, lo maravilloso de tu personalidad y lo hipnotizante de tus palabras; ahora tan solo quiero aprovechar el tiempo en tu regazo, amarte de la manera en que tanto anhelo, donde no falte ningún aspecto, y no exista el hambre sobre mi deseo.
Perdona si me pierdo, ¡Pero nunca pierdas la certeza de que siempre serás tú! Tus ojos preciosos a los que me encanta contemplar y la mirada en la que me gusta soñar, cuando nos encontramos en ese rato que nadie nos puede robar, en donde tu y yo nos podemos amar.
martes, julio 20
sábado, junio 5
Highlights on the table cloth.
-What is she made of?- The lovely Sophie asked to the wind, while her aunt was staring from behind.
She was petrified by the vision, she was trying to articulate but at her young age those things aren't known, so she was facing the unfamiliar, she didn't know how to react, what to do.
She never wondered what she was felling, she was just amazed and never realized that the image would never allow her to stare the rest of the world in the same way.
Her aunt was a middle age woman, who had been taking care of her nice the whole summer, and she was looking at her thoroughly behind her back. She had always thought she was particular girl, but she couldn't find a way to go along with her, they were so different, but at same time there was something in them that always dragged them together. Both loved sharing a cup of tea and orange cookies baked in the house oven.
They sit on their iron white chairs, white woolen gloves and bright dresses to stare around at the garden.
They didn't need to share a word, they had some sort of connection since they met.
[Incomplete].
She was petrified by the vision, she was trying to articulate but at her young age those things aren't known, so she was facing the unfamiliar, she didn't know how to react, what to do.
She never wondered what she was felling, she was just amazed and never realized that the image would never allow her to stare the rest of the world in the same way.
Her aunt was a middle age woman, who had been taking care of her nice the whole summer, and she was looking at her thoroughly behind her back. She had always thought she was particular girl, but she couldn't find a way to go along with her, they were so different, but at same time there was something in them that always dragged them together. Both loved sharing a cup of tea and orange cookies baked in the house oven.
They sit on their iron white chairs, white woolen gloves and bright dresses to stare around at the garden.
They didn't need to share a word, they had some sort of connection since they met.
[Incomplete].
lunes, mayo 31
Body touches.
When the lights went off in my head,
there's when desire started to wake...
A small movement of my hand went down,
and my fingertips brushed my abdominal skin,
going between my breasts until I reached my belly button,
going down, down, down...
I loved the way you carried me,
you hold me like a defenseless child,
a pretty girl that wants to be saved from what in her mind makes her cry.
A small lift: "You're not heavy".
I became the pink princess.
Too sparky, too lovely, too happy...
Going around and still my lips expecting to be touched,
but those things are never said.
Sh, sh... Wake up girl!
Twisted mind.
so again I'm between some arms,
...
when you don't think, you start to act.
Delicately and slowly, because when you move fast, the prey notices and is scared away.
At least is what they say.
The hair on my face,
my arms around your neck,
your intense breathing on my ears,
and my sleep resting on your shoulder.
Fantasies are an interesting matter,
How do you act when they are realized?
How's the move?
How's the touch?
When you are submerged in a world without speech,
you're only left with your senses,
how did we forgot that we posses them?
Expectation, emotion and adrenaline.
Have you ever taste?
How did your tongue answered?
Stop speaking with your mind,
soul or heart...
Let''s be reduce to our basics.
there's when desire started to wake...
A small movement of my hand went down,
and my fingertips brushed my abdominal skin,
going between my breasts until I reached my belly button,
going down, down, down...
I loved the way you carried me,
you hold me like a defenseless child,
a pretty girl that wants to be saved from what in her mind makes her cry.
A small lift: "You're not heavy".
I became the pink princess.
Too sparky, too lovely, too happy...
Going around and still my lips expecting to be touched,
but those things are never said.
Sh, sh... Wake up girl!
Twisted mind.
so again I'm between some arms,
...
when you don't think, you start to act.
Delicately and slowly, because when you move fast, the prey notices and is scared away.
At least is what they say.
The hair on my face,
my arms around your neck,
your intense breathing on my ears,
and my sleep resting on your shoulder.
Fantasies are an interesting matter,
How do you act when they are realized?
How's the move?
How's the touch?
When you are submerged in a world without speech,
you're only left with your senses,
how did we forgot that we posses them?
Expectation, emotion and adrenaline.
Have you ever taste?
How did your tongue answered?
Stop speaking with your mind,
soul or heart...
Let''s be reduce to our basics.
domingo, mayo 23
Let me hear a lasting beat.
The outer look, the staring from behind, a mutating disease, a lost love, a trembling walk, a rough science, heavy conscious, the hunter, the blessed child, my heart beating, all the things I've never done, all the things I said... what I said and what I didn't said, with all the pain, the revolt, the outer state of mind... you standing by, you're resting from all, you're leaving all.
You are, you are... you're absolutely everything, everything I love.
Jumpers and runners.
Y a pensar, yo no tuve... jamás...
Y los acordes pasan; las palabras y el rasgeo que llega a mis oídos y me punzan en el pecho.
Canto, canto... no, no.
Sin siquiera ver, ya no estoy, no más.
Situaciones intensas que no puedo desistir; permítame, disculpeme en mi explicar por que no me sé guiar, sólo sé que algo no anda bien; no sé esperar...
Todo lo que no pude.
El cosquilleo tibio en la nariz, trago amargo y mi cabeza se hunde más en el papel.
"Siempre soy lo claro entre los dos".
Te digo para recordar, suspiro para no sopesar.
Cuando la puerta se cerró a su espalda y ella no lo pudo notar.
lunes, abril 26
Expressions.
She was, I was, I stand, we are, I realize, I enjoy, I follow, I love.
Zip by zip, I'm here at the expectation.
There are so many things I can do, all those things that I move; the reason for me to be pleased at my reflection.
My daily doses... she said.
Well, I never thought of a person who can express as a drug to another person, but if I think about it, there's so many people that moves... takes and gives, feels and makes feel, makes go faster; speeding and looking at the lights in a turbo spin and the satisfaction of existence becomes present in body places that I can't identify.
I continue, because I can do it by myself, a self compact delusion...
[Incomplete].
sábado, abril 17
Which...
There's always something in me that says: I want to be with you forever.
When my head lays down and my eyes are closed.
It's when I'm in your arms and I feel that we can't be any closer,
but still I wish we could melt. Like if I could be in you.
I don't know the exact words.
I'm dazzled, I consider myself as an unstable creature.
Something to nothing.
But I can't do it alone. I am little bit sick.
I know I shouldn't, but humans can't control it all.
In my case: I have no control. It's bigger than me, goes out of my capacity.
It doesn't know how to be fully exposed.
I've submerge in you, looking up... staring from the under.
But I recall, you're just a human... the human of my adoration.
I know I'm letting myself go, got no shield, not sword, no helmet.
I got my arms open with my chest at the expectation.
But it's not because of you... I don't see a mutual.
It's just me in a battle field, we're not talking about trust or falling for each other,
It's me standing in the middle of nothing with all the things that can be directed pointing to you.
Morning thoughts I guess, a little psycho perhaps.
Because I don't know how I feel no more, as I once said... I think I'm going crazy!
It fell off of my hands and I don't see a way back.
I'm so sorry for making you play the game, I don't want you to miss the race.
I wish I could trust a little bit more but I feel like I'm no longer in the same field.
When my head lays down and my eyes are closed.
It's when I'm in your arms and I feel that we can't be any closer,
but still I wish we could melt. Like if I could be in you.
I don't know the exact words.
I'm dazzled, I consider myself as an unstable creature.
Something to nothing.
But I can't do it alone. I am little bit sick.
I know I shouldn't, but humans can't control it all.
In my case: I have no control. It's bigger than me, goes out of my capacity.
It doesn't know how to be fully exposed.
I've submerge in you, looking up... staring from the under.
But I recall, you're just a human... the human of my adoration.
I know I'm letting myself go, got no shield, not sword, no helmet.
I got my arms open with my chest at the expectation.
But it's not because of you... I don't see a mutual.
It's just me in a battle field, we're not talking about trust or falling for each other,
It's me standing in the middle of nothing with all the things that can be directed pointing to you.
Morning thoughts I guess, a little psycho perhaps.
Because I don't know how I feel no more, as I once said... I think I'm going crazy!
It fell off of my hands and I don't see a way back.
I'm so sorry for making you play the game, I don't want you to miss the race.
I wish I could trust a little bit more but I feel like I'm no longer in the same field.
Some times I feel like playing the doll,
wearing back the pink dress and the big bun.
Times when there was no time.
Spin and spin, walking and running...
I want to find that girl... tell her to run towards me.
jueves, marzo 11
Hugs for my basics.
There was somebody else tonight, with me... on my bedroom, in the same bed, in the clothes, in the same skin... but not the same mind.
I was thinking through someone else. I forgot who was me.
I realized I haven't fully smile in a while, when I supposed to be having the time of my life.
I had the challenge of the day, I had the random and special; the smile of the end when I closed my eyes for then to say: everything is worth it.
This is between you and me, being in the center of the graphic universe being the studied matter.
I got lost!
I'm sorry, I beg, to that couple that still expects to fill the desires of the little girl that once wanted a story for a good night... but she wants something else tonight: She worships her freedom more than anything else in the world.
She wants to be the girl that woke up everyday with the clear state of mind that moved her feet, and made her sing her own way.
It was heaven; the fully state of mind of being myself.
I'm still in love with that girl! I hope I can bring her back, because hell yeah, she knows what she wants.
I'm not talking about you baby, you're something else, but is not you the one that I need today.
miércoles, febrero 3
Blowers and viewers.
Let me get lost.
Go ahead with the wind and stay there, in my place, with myself.
I want to hold me, and try to have a little while in peace.
I don't need anybody! But it doesn't mean I don't want to.
Right now, I want to live for me.
I don't care about living in my mind, cause it's me the one that I end up at night.
When I'm alone, I look around and see, that I still have so much to know... I still don't know who's the girl that is dictating the words in my head... and the one that is typing.
Finding out.
Searching for the answer that you expect, but I realize that I haven't found which is the question. It's dysfunctional... maybe my head doesn't process.
Blocked.
It's me the one that I want to look in the mirror; it's me... and I don't want to hesitate.
The true is that I haven't looked at the mirror in a while.
If I insist with me, myself and I, why I find so hard to speak my mind in just one voice?.
And everyday, it feels to go very far, with the promise of the coffee for tomorrow.
And it's bittersweet; I haven't come clean with the reflection that it's pretending to be me.
jueves, enero 14
Kiss&tell.
It's true...
When we find something that explodes ourselves, it's easy to love it.
You're so right... and just like that.
I don't know... suddenly I started reacting with such nerves to let you go.
Who might tell? It takes so little.
So much interest, so much forgiven.
A link that bonds.
The world tells you, the game's over...
But there's another round served on the table.
Closing and opening... sounds like fun at the time.
An instant trip to the old times...
Now days, it seems so far.
miércoles, enero 6
Dreaming days.
They say that when we dream, we dream about our deepest fears, or most beloved wishes...
Oddly... last week, has been about my most desired wishes.
Everyday has been a new revelation of my unconscious mind...
sometimes its scary to see the truth about what my soul holds at night.
I wish I could have a word to speak, or the prime to say it is just a dream...
but it isn't. It's almost incredible how it follows you.
It's easy during daylight to forget 'what a sin is in the middle of a battlefield.'
But they chase you and come to you, because they want you... and I want them, it's just...I wont tell.
Believe me, there's no fresher morning air, just like a down breaking after an unforgettable kiss...
viernes, enero 1
Greetings to 2010.
Cause we aren't leaving behind, we are moving forward.
Sometimes we might don't understand why we move...
but we wouldn't grow if we stuck.
From the things that I left in the past, it was never on purpose,
but it doesn't mean I forgot, it means that you have already done what you were mean to.
I'm not leaving nothing behind, because everything stays with me; in my memory, in my heart.
Whatever I am now, I would't have get there without anything that surrounds me.
No matter what, we make our own path.
We choose what we want... at the time.
I'm choosing to look up, and walk my own way.
So let's pray to God, if anything goes wrong; find the way to improve it and the strength to face...
Let's learn to breath,
let's learn to leave,
to make dreams, and make them come true.
Cut our chains, and not stick.
Find inspiration on the simplest things,
because nothing will change... just the way we perceive.
Once we find this nirvana state, we can call ourselves free.
And we'll start to make the difference between the common and the amazing.
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